My potential so-called mid-life career change

Monique of Infertile Me provides much inspiration. Whilst TV might not be my best friend, at times that's certainly open for debate. And if there's one thing I'm quite capable of, it's rotting my brain via TV. Of course, I'm not so good at it now, as I was pre-kids, as my time and choices are understandably restricted during their waking hours.

My favorite tv show of late is (drum roll, please):

American Chopper, which I think is on TLC, but maybe it's on Discovery or something like that. I can't remember for sure. As long as I use that "remind me" feature on the remote control, I'm not really required to keep track of the actual channel. The kids do not understand this fascination at all. Trading Spaces, they're okay with, and Noah's favorite show is For Better or for Worse (go figure), but Chopper, they just don't get. But it's usually on after their bedtime, so they don't usually provide much interference.

Chopper has it all--conflict, profanity, humor and bike-building all rolled up in a tidy package. Now I hearing your rumblings, and no, I've never ridden or even considered riding a motorcycle in my whole life and I've certainly never seen a "chopper", but from afar. Admittedly, my life experience is limited in this arena. Quite possibly, bike-building isn't the glamourous lifestyle as indicated by this oracle. Maybe. I am willing to consider that fact briefly.

But still, the show appeals to me. I've spent an inordinate amount of time thinking about this, turning it over my my non-biker-babe brain. The idea of taking metal, paint, and a bunch of other crap and somehow (presto, change-o) rendering it driveable is just somehow appealing. A chopper sometimes is almost like art--depending on the builder, the different combinations of frames, colors, shapes, and use of effects make such an awesome individual creation. I could be a bike-artist (meanwhile, conveniently forgetting that no one has ever ever ever for any reason considered me artistic). At the end of their project, they have a bike to show for it! A shiny, chrome-y bike. How cool is that? Part of this show's appeal, is, I'm sure, the shiny-ness. How can one resist shiny? It's simple: ya just can't. Plus, the general bitchiness of Paulie and Senior combined with the sponge-bob-y quality of Mikey just heightens the irresistibleness.

So now I want to make a bike. I don't want to ride it or whatever, I just want to build it. The best I can discern is that first, I will need to learn how to fabricate metal. That seems to be a key issue. The other stuff I decide to figure out later. Being his usual helpful and oh-so-supportive self, DH pipes up that he doesn't know where the hell I'm going to learn how to do that. My dad, who at least tries, says that I'll have to be an apprentice somewhere (the vagueness isn't his fault, it's the best he can figure), and then they (whoever I'm apprenticed to? is that who 'they' is?) will teach me the trade.

Huh.

The apprenticeship sounds like more commitment than I want to put out, in the name of bike building. It sounds like an awful lot of effort, too. I was thinking more along the lines of a month-long class at the local tech school or a book on tape or something.